Chloe Dykstra ‘Considered Ending It’ After #MeToo Allegations Against Chris Hardwick

Chloe Dykstra ‘Considered Ending It’ After #MeToo Allegations Against Chris Hardwick

For the first time since her Medium post went viral, Chloe Dykstra is speaking out about her #MeToo experience. In a new article on a year of sexual misconduct allegations, Dykstra told Time that, “After months of reading horrible things about myself, I got to such a low point that I considered ending it.”

Dykstra’s alleged abuser, whom she has never actually named, is presumed to be Nerdist founder and Talking Dead host Chris Hardwick. A Mashable report on the “traumatic account of the couple’s relationship” explained, “Although Dykstra does not out Hardwick as the ex by name in the post, she provided details that could have only been Hardwick.” Hardwick denied Dykstra’s allegations in a lengthy statement, insisting at one point that, “At no time did I sexually assault her.”

Looking back on her experience after speaking out, Dykstra told Time, “I didn’t really have guidance because you can’t really Google, ‘How to handle being an accuser?’”

The original Medium post, entitled “Rose-Colored Glasses: A Confession,” went viral in June. In the essay, Dykstra writes about her ex, a man “almost 20 years my senior” whom she met at a convention. “Within 2 weeks,” she wrote, “rules were quickly established.” Dykstra was expected to clear her schedule, reserving every weeknight for her partner. She was barred from having close male friends, from drinking alcohol, and from speaking “in public places.”

“I was terrified to piss him off—so I did what he said,” Dykstra recalls. “Including let him sexually assault me. Regularly. I was expected to be ready for him when he came home from work…Every night, I laid there for him, occasionally in tears. He called it ‘starfishing.’ He thought the whole idea was funny. To be fair, I did go along with it out of fear of losing him. I’m still recovering from being sexually used (not in a super fun way) for three years.”

“I, myself, had very little personal support, as…

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